Yes... I can be very GREEDY, self indulgent, a bag full of BLISS all for me...
when I crave or want something... I will let no one, or anything hold me back from what I WANT. Even if I don't have the funds, transportation.. WHATEVER.. usually when I want something BAD ENOUGH... unless its like some crazy shit like CRACK or something..(and no I DO NOT DO CRACK) I WILL EVENTUALLY GET IT.
But....its not ALWAYS like this... and when its not like how I want it.... then... the nature of the Beast rolls in... and becomes a SAV.. and takes over, carelessly, without prejudice, on what the case might be.. without regards to anyones feelings but myself.
And I CANNOT let this continue... so far.... so good.. but I can feel it in me... wanting, yearning, craving..
Sometimes...I can get soo into it.... that I put myself in a Euphoric like state.....and its FUCKING BLISS-
I understand all of this.. and I understand the power or the energy I give or play into it is ALLL DONE by me and my desicion-
I've noted mentally and by heart due to life experiences -tooo much of something... can lead to ONLY BAD-
There has to be a medium... and that medium in this case is called MODERATION-
but in other cases... which are far from just being MODERATE... I know exactly what I have to do..
Everyone has demons- mine happens to be a SAVAGE BEAST- and with that ... in regards to other situations... I will put it on beast mode as well.. but take things a step further... and just COMPLETELY shut it down-
