I Feel burnt out.. I did way too much these past 2 weeks.. I
can feel it in my body… Physically, emotionally…
Physically I feel tiered and out of it.. emotionally.. I’m
going thru what a normal female goes thru but I think my feelings on things are
Super sensitive… I have to keep on telling myself inside –
ENOUGH ANALYNN – SLOW DOWN-
There hasn’t been a day since I came back from LA where I
just burst into tears thinking about Herbie…
Today my Uncle Jimmy posted a pic of him at Herbie’s
grave stating “I miss you Son”…
I couldn’t even control myself- tears just ran down and
wouldn’t stop… As a parent .. the one thing you should NEVER have to do…
Is bury your child… it should be the other way around…Fuck
it hurt soo bad.. Yes… my emotions are
riding super high…..
Then I get to this point inside me where I feel like I’m not
doing enough…
Soo many things running thru my head.. I had a long ass talk
with my parents when we drove to LA…
And it made me think about a lot of things… my kids, my
life, my money-
My anxiety attacks have came back but STRONGER-
I’m mentally beating myself up inside.. because all of this
is NOT me..
And I do not Like how I feel about myself right now…
I know part of this is my anxiety and grieving- It is hard to cope, handle, to take in all
these things…. I know I just gotta do it
Day by day.. and stay strong-
