a Beautiful impact- yes you are... (~.~)

Just like everyone… I had a CRAZY childhood life.. but I was also blessed with 2 fathers in my life… and I thank GOD for that..despite how things went down and how we came to be… MEL is my DADDY, and GREG is my PAPA  Although I don’t see my PAPA (my real biological father) a lot or as much as I want.. I’ve always known.. no matter what, HE is there for me. I can’t stress enough how important it is to be an active mother in your child’s life but to be a DAD a PAPA … means the whole world to his baby girl… Anyways, my Papa called me up yesterday.. actually I called him first but I guess he was busy and he called me back.. it was his Birthday and I wanted to say Happy Birthday Papa.. “I love you” – I know he was happy to hear my voice as I was his.. my younger sister Gina tells me.. At’e Analynn Papa always call me by your name- we laugh about it.. but then inside I feel sad about it too… I was his lil side-kick on the weekends growing up… and as we got older and things changed… I saw less and less of him. He remarried a wonderful lady and had 2 more kids with her along with her already having 5 from her previous marriage.. and you know.. I couldn’t be more happy for my papa.. because for a while.. he was always alone.. Sure he had friends, and his roommates that lived with him and what not… but I felt his emptiness when he would drop me back home to Vallejo. We talked for awhile and he told me not to work out soo much anymore.. I’m good he doesn’t want me to get any skinnier.. I was like .. Are you serious???!! All those times when I was younger how he would tell me "Analina you are soo pretty but soo fat!" and now he's telling me to not get any skinnier??.. lol!!! But I told him I workout mainly to maintain, stay fit, and stay active- he was like ok, but just don’t do too much. I’m planning to take a drive down and visit him and everyone soon.. I miss the LaChica side of the family. I don’t know what it is about “I” but I ache inside about him.. what he’s going thru.. knowing what kind of father he is.. and all the things he’s does and how he is.. maybe because… it just reminds me soo much when I was a lil girl..and what my papa went thru, did… I DON’T mean this in any feminine way.. but he is soo fucking Beautiful in and out… and I don’t know.. but,I’m praying for him everyday.. I don’t wanna tell him how I can’t sleep either at night because he is sooo heavily on my mind.. like one of my good friends advised me… all I could do is show love and be there for him..