I’ve been definitely off track for awhile- This morning I came in early to work.. I walked straight down pier 14 to the end and sat there and watched the sunrise over the Baybridge..
I thought about EVERYTHING I was going thru. I cried my heart out to God, and I let him know this was enough, I can’t handle so I’m giving it all to him.. and Yes I’m sorry I never really talk to you much as I should… I know you’ve been always there for me.. but at this time.. all I want is Peace in my heart and in my mind.
So I’m letting it all go- and with that.. a big EXHALE.. it is what it is – que sera sera
As far as my workouts… I’ve been slacking.. all because of the BS.. but last night.. I did punch on my bag for awhile and worked up a good sweat.
When I took my first break earlier, the shoe stop owner called me in.. we see each other almost everyday for the last 10 years… a couple of years ago he called me in and said my
Shoes were too big for me and put in a cushion support thing so I could walk better in them for free.. it was sweet of him to do that..
So today when I went In I questioned him .. umm theres nothing wrong with the flip flops im wearing is there? He laughed… said no…he asked me if I was ok? He noticed that I’ve lost a ton a weight
What was I doing? Am I sick? Lol I laughed no.. I’m not sick.. I did a lifestyle change.. so I gave him a break down of my workouts, what I eat.. etc..
He told me he was super happy for me.. I look like a changed person.. I must be so happy now.
Yes, I am happy about my weight loss.. I’m estactic about it actually.. so this is something that I’m gonna keep up and KEEP POSITVIE about.
I’m still at 134lbs that’s a total of 103 lbs lost Hail yea, I’ve WORKED OUT HARD to get to where I’m at now. HOLD strong AND stay ON TRACK Analynn the inner me keeps telling itself..
I AM AND I WILL.
So.. I’ve been putting a little cash to the side for my goal gift. .. I saw this Kim Kardashian dress made by BEBE.. I saw it on line when I weighed in at 160 I thought to myself then if I can drop down to 125 -120… I’m BUYING IT!!!! I’m short by $50 bucks… but its ok.. because everytime I lose a pound.. I throw in $2 to $3 in my save jar.. so if everything calculates correctly.. I’m on target on time and on my weigh!! (smiles) I feel kinda selfish sometimes that I’m gonna spend money on a dress… but who cares.. its for me.. MY WHOLE entire life I’ve always weighed over 60lbs or more than what I should weigh and ya, I’ve never gotten to wear BEBE cuz my fat ass couldn’t fit in it… so now it can.. and NOW I WILL
Josh is BACK!!! Yeee!! He’s here for a couple of weeks then he goes to Okinawa. So they’re having a picnic party for him at Benicia this weekend.. I’m looking forward to it.. family and friends I haven’t seen in awhile.. its gonna be good..
I wanted to blog about last weekend… It was my papa’s 70th surprise birthday party. I was super excited because I was gonna see family members I hadn’t seen in DECADES..
I saw my Lola Bess.. I ran up to her and gave her a huge hug.. I told her I missed her and re-introduced my kids to her… I noticed she wasn’t really talkative with me.. but didn’t think to much of it.
Anyways my step sister comes up to me and tells me right before my papa gets there… We are having 7 people say a speech about your dad and you’re one of them.
I started sweating.. ARE YOU SERIOUS? I don’t know why I became so nervous… maybe because I wasn’t sure what to say.. maybe because I wasn’t so close to my papa as I wished I was? I guzzled down a glass of chardonnay and then refilled…
My papa’s best friend made a speech.. it was cute.. how they both got married at the same time, how they both got divorced, how they both re-married, etc… they went thru the same life changes and phases together and it was cool of them having each other’s back during the rough times..
Then my Tita Natie made a speech (my papa’s only sister) She talked about how he was growing up in the PI and how he protected her a lot.. cute childhood stories, and how when became a man..How she is soo happy for her brother and how he has lived such a good 70 years.. and there’s only more to come..
Next was my Lola Bess- She made a speech about how when my dad first came here to the united states.. and after my mom and him split.. he went thru a lonesome time with just me and him.. and so every weekend he would take me to my Lola’s Beauty shop on 19th avenue, they would do my hair, paint my nails, we would have lunch and walk around the city going to the little Chinese bakeries..
She mentioned that my Papa was her FAVORITE GRANDSON and mentioned about a story when he went MIA when he fell in love with my step mom. It brought me WAAAY back to memory lane.. I almost forgot about those times…
Then they called me up… I WAS SWEATING.. nervous.. they handed me the Mic… and.. I started off with… I am Greg’s Oldest daughter Analynn from his first marriage.. I know EVERYONE here knows my dad is a very good handyman, can fix anything, doesn’t speak much but does a lot.. But I Know my papa is also a VERY BLESSED man.
For a short time in his life it was just him and me. And I recalled how he took me to Lola’s beauty salon, always trying to surround me with family…
My papa only got me on weekends due to court visitation.. so when he did.. driving back and fourth from Vallejo to San Francisco sometimes made my papa tired.. so when we get to Vallejo he would park down the street from my moms house and take a nap… Well one day, before my papa dropped me off he took a nap.. me being a snoopie kid.. went into the glove box, the console, his wallet…
I found a picture of me and him… and on the back was written “I sacrifice for my only daughter because I know one day she will be SOMEBODY”
It was then my voice got cracky tears began to run down my eyes.. and I told my dad.. I am Somebody.. He molded me into the STRONG lady I am today..
I forgot what else I said.. but afterwards was the funny part…
My lola bess ran up to me in tears said she didn’t realize it was me and was in TOTAL SHOCK… gave me a big hug and talked with me for a long time…
Then as we were headed to sit down to start lunch, my other girl cousins and sisters came up to me and said “At’e Analynn, you’re speech was the best one.. it was soo nice it made us cry..”
Lol I didn’t mean to make them cry.. but I soo wanted to share that.. because I wanted my papa to know.. I am Strong… I am doing… I will make it.. .just like him…
Hope everyone has a nice weekend..I'll probably re-edit this later and put more pics time for me to go and RELAX
